This episode dives into Stephen Porges' polyvagal theory as it relates to early childhood development. This theory outlines the concept of safety in infancy/toddlerhood as being the foundation for healthy social development. As discussed in this episode, looking at the nervous system through this social lens enhances our ability and need as human beings to connect with others in order to achieve optimal health both in the body and in the psyche.

Along with this discussion, we talk about the role of the autonomic nervous system in regulating the stress response of an individual, what happens to the brain under chronic stress/perpetual "fight or flight," and how we can nurture safety in our own parenting practices. Our way of perceiving the world and our experiences leave very real imprints on the nervous system, and especially so during these early, formative years of development. 

When it comes to nurturing safety for the health of a developing nervous system, it's important that parents remember that stress is often relative. "If it’s a big deal to them, it should be a big deal to us," as Macy states. The more a child perceives a threat or feels stressed and their nervous system is on high alert, then less of a threatening stimulus is needed to elicit the same stress response, and it becomes a vicious cycle. Eventually this can go on until a child dissociates or completely shuts down because the stress is just too much to handle.

So keeping this very sensitive socially-driven nervous system in mind, it’s important to remember that helping kids grow and learn means supporting them through the discomfort and growing pains, not throwing them to the wolves for the sake of promoting independence. Little ones need to be nurtured far more than they need to be pushed and pressured into learning developmental tasks on a certain timeline. With a solid, safe foundation and ample opportunities for practicing skills in the context of secure family relationships, children will have the best chance to succeed later. 

The Polyvagal Theory

https://www.polyvagalinstitute.org

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html

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